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I want to help you find freedom from fear and authentic community. Book a free 60-min consultation!
I help exvangelicals free themselves from fear and isolation. This is not an overnight process, but after years of navigating my own deconstruction and walking alongside others, I have found that many of us need to follow some variation of the following steps. I designed this progress pathway to bring structure and peace to a process that is sometimes confusing.
For years you have been told what to believe, but now you have the ability to decide for yourself. This can be both exhilarating and overwhelming. In this stage, you will begin with a period of self-reflection to help you gain clarity around your values, mindset, and the type of life you want to design.
The loss of Sunday mornings, small groups, prayer, worship music, and other rituals can be disorienting. During this stage in the process, you will choose healthy habits to incorporate into your lifestyle so you feel calmer and more grounded as we continue to do the hard work of deconstruction.
There are so many emotions wrapped up in the decision to leave a faith community, and it takes time to sort through all of the baggage. At this time, it is important to find ways to be informed by these emotions without allowing them to overpower you. There is also a tendency to revert to black/white thinking which results in increased judgment. We will begin to do the hard work of releasing fear and judgment of ourselves and others while also identifying limiting beliefs that are blocking progress.
One of the most painful consequences of deconstructing faith is losing your community, friendships, and possibly even family members in the process. Many exvangelicals realize that they can no longer be open and honest with people who have served as their support system for most of their lives. At this time, you will evaluate where you might need to set boundaries and also explore ways to find others who share your values and allow you the space needed to discover your authentic self.
It is possible that you were born into the faith system that you are now leaving, with little to no interaction with other religions. In many conservative churches, other beliefs are even demonized. Once you have a strong sense of who you are and what you value, now is the time to decide what faith should look like for you. Perhaps you will want to explore other faith traditions, find a new branch within your current construct, or leave organized religion altogether. What matters is that you feel free to choose from a healthy place rather than a place of fear.
Through this work, you will walk away with a sense of freedom and inner peace. You will learn to trust your own inner voice and feel confident in your choices. You will find people with whom you can share all parts of yourself and no longer feel the need to hide for fear of judgment or shame.
Coaching is a creative process that helps individuals maximize their personal and professional potential. The relationship between a coach and client is a powerful alliance in which the coach helps the client recognize and move beyond inner blocks while gaining clarity and forward momentum.
During our confidential 50-minute sessions, I will utilize a variety of skills and strategies to help you tap into your own intuition and experience powerful transformation and growth. Sessions will take place over the phone or through video conferencing. I will work with you to determine the style and approach that will work best for you to maximize results. Together we will shift your energy so you can claim the life you want.
In order for coaching to work, we have to make sure we are a good fit. First, you will have a free 60-minute consultation in which you and I can both learn more about one another. I will answer any questions you might have, and we can look at different packages that might work well for you. Our first two sessions will take 70 minutes in order for me to get to know exactly what our goals will be and share results of your Energy Leadership Index assessment. Following this session, the rest will be 50-minute sessions either over the telephone or on Zoom video-conferencing. At times I might suggest reflection work or reading, but the sessions and goals will be client-driven.